Episode One, originally transmitted on BBC2, 13 September 1999

Typewriter keys punch out the words: 'All stories are love stories'.

Belfast. Jake, recently single and working for a repossession firm, forcefully removes goods on a housing estate with his co-workers, Protestants Crab and Hally, who don't realise that Jake is Catholic. Meanwhile, Jake's Protestant friend Chuckie collects his dole money. That evening, Jake, Deasley and Septic Ted gather for Chuckie's 30th birthday drinks. Chuckie is in no birthday mood, complaining about his failure to achieve either wealth or fame. News of a local businessman, John Long, securing a £1 million grant from the Ulster Development Board sets Chuckie thinking, and he rushes home to plan his own venture.

Chuckie pays a visit to John Long, who refuses financial help but offers words of advice. Jake and Crab are interrupted in the pub by a small boy selling the Belfast Telegraph. The boy insults Crab, who attacks him, to Hally's disgust. The landlord forcefully throws the boy out. Outside, the boy tells Jake his name is Roche.

Jake visits the beachside home of the foster parents who, he recalls, made a human being of him. Matt and Mamie are arguing with their latest teenage charge, but greet Jake warmly and invite him to stay for dinner. Mamie guesses that Jake's relationship with Sarah is over, but he declines to talk about it. Back at the pub, Jake drunkenly flirts with barmaid Mary. Mary drives him home and they have sex, but Mary later leaves.

Jake is listening to Hally's fantasies of exterminating Catholics when he spies Chuckie entering a bank and follows him. Chuckie explains his new venture: a scam selling non-existent sex toys by mail order. He has already accumulated £17,382.

Chuckie impresses the Ulster Development Board with a compelling business proposal. He celebrates by buying a round of drinks. An American woman named Max makes an impression on him. Meanwhile, Jake angrily harangues a poet who has delivered a hymn to Republican gunmen; he is dragged from the pub by a group of men, who accuse him of being a Unionist paramilitary. Max appears and calmly stops the fighting. She invites Chuckie home and they make love. In the morning Chuckie buys an expensive car and drives it back to Eureka Street. That night, Jake is violently attacked on his doorstep by a policeman - Mary's boyfriend. The letters 'OTG' have been painted on the road.